In a collision of smarmy self importance and light rod-ness that seems to have been crafted specifically to ruin my smoothie, Usher has announced plans for a "ladies only" tour called "One Night Stand." Naturally, the venues will be "intimate" (see what he did there?). Here are some of the other things Usher had to say about the tour:
"There's only a few artists that can pull that off." (perhaps - oh wait, do you mean you?)
"The ladies like to see that masculine build."
Oh you're right there, Usher. We're gagging for it. Or just gagging. You decide. (Hint: we're just gagging.)
More good news! Usher is planning his own line of ladies' lingerie and "men's undergarments." I guess I'll now have to add "owns Usher brand underwear" to my ever growing list of man deal breakers.
Wake me up when there's a Prince Paul ladies only tour. Unlikely, yes, but THAT I'd be ok with. (Could I show my age any more than suggesting Prince Paul as a good replacement for Usher?) Or my former econ professor ladies only tour. I'm going to resist the urge to make a supply and demand joke here. It's early.
